You Would Think That We Would Know Better

This week I witnessed two train wrecks. OK metaphorically speaking only.

It happened via email and I am so thankful that it had nothing to do with me or the church or anyone any of you know so don't go jumping to conclusions, really, don't do it!

The deal is that both of these situations could have been averted or the damage lessened if the parties involved made one simple decision. Pick up the damn phone!!!! Sorry, but by now we should know better.

It never ceases to amaze me. We should all know by now that if we are trying to communicate something from the heart, something that we are emotionally tied to then we should never ever do it via email. I wish I knew why this is the way it is, but I know it to be true. Email is a great tool for communicating information from one person or group to another, but it is a horrible tool for communicating feelings, emotions or something that is heartfelt. Something to do with the electrons or maybe the light from the screen deadens our cells but it does not work. I remember when email first started getting popular you heard about people sending stuff to the wrong people or email getting someone in trouble because they did not realize that once you send an email you have no control over what happens to it after you hit the send key. Most of us get that concept pretty well, but many of us fail to realize that sometimes the best way to get our message across is to take the time to call or have coffee.

I think many of us have become emotionally paralyzed. We are afraid that somehow if we talk to the other person face to face, it is not going to go well. We forget that in "real life" we have a much better chance of a successful conversation occurring than via the internet. When we sit together face to face you read my facial expressions, I read yours. I read your body language, you read mine, you see the sincerity in my face or see the fear in my eyes and you realize that I really care about the relationship, I see you whine or fold your arms or turn away and I realize that I am causing you pain and I try another softer route to communicate. None of these things can happen in an email.

But we do it anyway. We are too busy or we are more likely too angry and feel we have to get it out and we write and hit send and then reread what we wrote and wince. We wish we could take it back but it is too late. Or we write something that we would never ever say to a person face to face, but since we are typing it into a computer, our filters are tossed out the window and we say what we feel, never considering what we are saying could cost us the relationship that we have with the recipient.

This Lenten season, I encourage all of us to make our relationship with each other a priority. As we walk humbly with God and seek justice, let us remember that Jesus said that the world would know us by the love we have for each other. Take the time to seek out others. Create space for communication. If you get an email that seems out of sorts, pick up the phone and give them a call. Like I said, this blog has nothing to do with me or our community, but I thought it is a good reminder to all of us.

Peace

Edwin